I wish...

I could tell you more about my job. The good parts.
The parts where the children do the most precious amazing things. And say the most amazing things. Of course I can tell you about them, but if I could show you there picture, and give you their names, it would all make more sense..

I will say again, that this year's class is different. Although there are many who came to me speaking ZERO English, all are speaking now. I have children from Pakistan, Sudan, Saudi Arabia, Bolivia, Ecuador, and more. They are the most "Typical" group I have had in a while. As in, they are ready to learn, ready to listen, and little. They are not a fast group. They are not socially aware of things they shouldn't be aware of. They slip everyday and call my momma..At least once a week, every week, one little guy brings me flowers. He actually uses one of his dollars at the Dollar Store to buy my a bundle of silk flowers. I have kept them on my table, and honestly the arrangement is now HUGE!

When I close my classroom door, I am the happiest. I dread reading emails as someone is going to tell me what additional test we need to do. Tell me what other form we need for data purposes. It's really sad. Because what the schools are doing now is trying to make it look good on paper. And it kills me. After 22 years, I know what children need. I know how to direct my instruction to those who may struggle. But now, we assume we need to do that sort of intervention for every child. And we don't. We have so many children in the class that just need time..Time to hear the info over and over. Time to practice. Time to let it all soak in. Not more tests..

Anyway, My sweeties are on my mind today. I enjoyed last week so much. I just wish I could show you pictures so you would see what I get to see everyday! I tell me students not to bring me candy because I will be "Fat Like Santa Clause". Friday, one student brought a little candy for himself and said in his little broken English, " Ms. Green, Imma eat all my candy and be sooo fat like Santa Clause!"  They listen to everything I say! God Love 'Em!

The Grands are Not Well

My mom went to her vascular surgeon yesterday and all the news was bad..  Both of her carotid arteries are occluded. BOTH. She had the surgery just a few years ago, but sadly didn't stop smoking and kept her diet basically the same. So now, we are back to step one, except worse. The doctor told her that her body is finding ways to get blood to her brain, but she is dizzy a lot, and has very little strength when she stretches her arms out..
She will see another doctor next week. But honestly, I want to throw up about it.
Today at school I was asking our secretary about the possibilities,{She is an RN}and out of no where, I burst into tears. And then that thing happened. The thing where my lips and chin area go sort of numb and tingly and my heart feels like it is going to beat out of my chest, yet when I touch my chest my heart is not even pounding. I sat down at my table, and put my head between my legs and took slow breaths. It lasted for about an hour. Since I started my day in tears, I was on the edge of more tears during this "thing." I felt very shaky and thought that I would pass out MANY times this morning. There is nothing wrong with me. I had a million tests a few years ago. Brain scans, blood work, EEG's, X-rays, and Nothing. At the time my doctor felt like it was anxiety and I didn't believe him. Today, I am leaning towards considering, that this MAY be an accurate diagnoses..

All I could do today was feel nervous and worried.

Then I came home and my mom said my dad is in the hospital..
He has been having more and more episodes of Atrial fibrillation lately. He packed his truck to come up here and really overdid it. His hear rhythm converted with medication this afternoon, but the doctor at the hospital is keeping him over night. His cardiac enzyme study showed elevated levels which is sometimes an indication of the onset of a heart attack.

I begged my dad  to NOT drive here tomorrow. He is stopping in north Florida at my uncle's house and says he will spend the night. I begged him to also spend the night midway between north Florida and Virginia. He usually drives from Virginia to South Florida in one shot! Crazy I know..

So today I am a ball of sad and worried nerves. Thank goodness my students are eager little beavers and keep me moving all day.
Say a little prayer for my parents. They could use it!

At The Embassy with an Official Whose Name I Cannot Recall

This is one of my favorite years at the Embassy Easter Party..AugustRose had her cast and was tickled with the flowers in her hair!

This year is the first year in a while that I am truly excited about the COH Easter Party. There will be press there, and I am hopeful that someone can get on camera and share what the US really thinks about Putin's new law..All with respect. Yeah Right! I am hoping to meet some Mom's from the RAM group.

Just a little Nesting Doll goodness...

Please Pardon the Dust

As I try to install the blog template that I have worked on for two days..
It doesn't seem to work, and because I am too lazy to save my old templates, it just keeps changing into templates that will "do" until I can figure it out...

Where Is The Love?

It's Valentine's Day, and I am asking myself, "Where is the love?" If I am honest, I realize that my girlz fill the love cup for the most part, but today when so many are celebrating with the grown up in their life, I ask myself what happened to me that makes me so strongly opposed to being with someone? Maybe the heartache I suffered in my marriage? Maybe that humiliation was so firmly implanted on me that I am dead set against love...?
There really isn't a place in my world for love, but I am starting to miss it. Starting to miss the butterflies. Starting to miss the security of knowing there is someone out there who loves me in a grown up way. I am starting to miss someone who can be in my life to talk with about life, work, the girlz.
I am not sure if I will ever be able to reconcile the two feelings. One side of my heart opposed, and one side who is just sentimental enough to think love can work out.

I am hoping that one day Mr. Right will pop up out of the blue, and it will all work out like a fairy tale..
Then again, I don't believe in fairy tales..

Making Changes

School has been tough these days. Not for me, but for my Anni. She is sort of lost right now. She is struggling to organize herself. We have fussed and fought and cried and pouted. Report cards came home yesterday and she made a C on her report card. Needless to say, we are not happy. And we have had to make a daily chart to help her figure out what assignments she needs to work on, and what needs to be done around the house..
4th Grade has been a big jump. And we are all feeling it. There are mood swings that I feel are hormone related.

I have had to make some big parenting changes as I don't want any more C's on the report card. And she needs to feel better about school in general. We started with changing the bed time. I firmly believe that rest helps everyone feel better so we have backed the bedtime to 8:30. And it has worked wonders on the attitudes! Even mine.

I am contacting schools again for possible transfers. I really need to eliminate the 40 hours a month I spend on the road. It would be awesome to use that time with my own children.

My students this year have truly saved my career. If I had a rough year like last year, I would have resigned. It was more than I could deal with. This years sweeties are the most precious little things. I don't have to get really tough with them. Cause they are just too kind. My team was out yesterday for a planning meeting and I stopped by the cafeteria to say hello and they all jumped up and ran to me. We miss you Ms. Green. Are you finished with your meeting?
Come on, do your coworkers say that to you????

They are also very prepared for school. They do their work, they try their best, and they are well parented! And that makes all the difference. Sure there are some kids who are a little bit behind, but that is normal. And it is not just my class, all 4 kindies are like that. We are very lucky to have this group of babies!!

Auggie is doing great and made all S+ on her report card. They don't get A's and B's yet. Only S's and U's...The plus just shows she is doing well! She rec'd a Quality Student Award for citizenship and study skills. She still loves school. Last week she was sick and throwing up, and I had to keep her home. She cried and begged me to let her go. She said she would bring her throw-up bucket in case she needed to get sick..Poor thing.

I am organizing our Disney Trip and planning our summer. It is starting to really sink in that the beach house is gone. I could use that view and  the dolphins right about now.

Names...

I was reading the responses in RAM and wanted to share our story about names..*This is also one of those stories that my daughters will want to know later on, so here's one for the memory book!!

I had made the decision to adopt. I had chosen Russia over China. (At the time the decision was made based on wanting a child who could possibly look like me..)My documents were in Russia and I was waiting for a referral..  It had been a week since everything was "in" and I was working on the final documents for the second part of my dossier. That's when I got a call that my agency was going to FedEx a video and medical report on a child..I was just tickled.
At the time, I had tentatively planned on naming the baby Mary Garland. And then I saw the video.
++I had assumed that the baby would be a lifeless little lump surrounded by caregivers who had neither the time or desire to care for the child. I assumed I would see  a terribly sad clip of an unfortunate child..
But the Video. Oh The Video..
It was very short, but showed everything a doctor would need to see to make an educated guess on the health of the child.

 She was lying in her crib with a toy in her LEFT hand, and the caregiver chatted and sort of sung, "Khoroshaya devochka...Ohhhh Annichka, Ahhh, Annichka, Khoroshaya Annichka..

And I was sunk...Annichka. I loved it.  And since part of my name is Ann, I thought it was perfect. And since it is traditional to have double names in the south, I thought about keeping the name Anna as part of this baby's name. She definitely knew her name, and she was only 9 months. So I kept it and added Mary to it..
If I am honest, I wish I would have just left it as Anna, because only my mother and her teachers call her MaryAnna. Around these parts she is Anni. And almost as much, she is Annichka..


And then there is baby..
This was a situation much different than Anni's adoption. After being in "the system" during the whole re-organization of the MOE and the licensing of American agencies, I had been stuck for so long. And then all of the sudden I received a phone call asking if I would fly blind to Novosibirsk..I would be the first to go there through my agency, and would have to go without anything but a birthdate. And I did it. Just a few days after deciding to do this, I rec'd one sad little picture of Auggie. I almost changed my mind. It was that pitiful. I went searching on the database to find this child and she was there. I couldn't believe her name.

Anna. And not just the same first name as Anni, their names were so similar it struck me odd.

Big sister's full birth name:
Anna Vladimirovna Solovyova
and Now
Anna Vladimirovna Seleznova..
There was no way I could have used any part of her name. I didn't want to give her a name that was Russian but not really her name!
At points I wanted to name this child TwoLa Bell..Two as in baby number two, and Bell after my grandmother. Everyone said it was to silly. After all, we are not in Hollywood.

I wanted a name that sort of flowed with Anni's name. (Pronounced On-ee). When I would say that first Awww" I would always say, August. And then big sister got involved. She loved it when I would say August Lee. And big sister would always add Rose. So we played around with August Rose, August Lee, but in the end, we gave her all of the names.
AugustRose Lee 
I still wish there would have been some way of keeping a part of her name, but what are ya gonna do?

I would love to hear your children's names and how they came to be!