On a Side Note..

Can you imagine how long it's been since writing APA style and citing endless sources? A while.

I have come to remember hanging indents, running headers, and the APA handbook...and they are now my new best friends!
I have enjoyed pushing myself in this way. I used to write scholarly texts in an awesome sort of way, but blogging, texting, tweeting, and facebook have sunk my skills to an all time LOW~ re-learning is often pretty meaningful.

And on another note. Do you ever get the sense that there are 2 groups of people.
Group 1 is the smallest, and consists of people who learn their lessons pretty quickly. Maybe they didn't at one point, and something traumatic or painful pushed them into this group.

Group 2 is where I think a large percentage of people fall..
I mean come on, are you still thinking he will change?
Is he really going to leave his wife for you?
OH,,I see, NOW you know how to successfully drink and drive. NOW, after your 3rd DUI you all LEARNED UP!
OK, so you are always broke, and owe people money? So that big new toy in your front yard? I guess you needed that "insert whatever high priced item you see fit"..
Right....your bullshit job that pays you nothing is important to you, never the mind that it doesn't cover your bills...
So tell me again. Why are you going out to dinner or movies when you owe everybody and their brother?

Ohhhh, I get it. Calling me "Dude" in an apology letter makes you all of the sudden credible.

I am surrounded in life with people who make the right decisions and are with me in group 1. But there are those on the fringe that I have to laugh at. We have all told them. We have all shaken our heads slowly up and down with our mouths wide open as they share about this new "thing" they just bought..(cringing at the fact that they never did pay ya back the money they owe..)

and for the record. It took me a long time to get out of that group. But after learning my lessons, I happily swim in the "got it pond."

Checking in..

I haven't been run over by a truck, nor have I run away from home..

GRADUATE SCHOOL
PARENTING
TEACHING

NUFF SAID..

I have a required blog from one of my graduate classes that I have been working on..
Everything I have on there is a required entry, so it takes me a week to get the info published. Take a look if you please..
www.chaosandglueguns.blogspot.com/

Another Krap Sandwich That Has Wrecked My Orphan Sunday...

Clearly I am in the throws of a midlife crisis..
If you could see the chaos in my house, my general life anxiety, the pain of what I think is the dreaded return of H-Pylori, you'd say, "Maybe your life is a mess, and it's not the midlife crisis."
But I forgot to remind you that I am in graduate school. And the courses move quickly. I forgot to share that what I thought was a grant approved program, is not. Meaning, the program does not qualify for the 20K I just accepted. Because I work in a Title 1school, I was supposed to be able to teach for 5 years and the dreaded 20K would disappear. Well over the weekend I received notice that I do not meet the requirement for the grant. You see, I don't teach science or math, I am not a reading specialist..WTF? You morons deciding on the grant, I TEACH ALL OF THOSE THINGS!!! So now, after working my tail off, I have to figure out this equation.
Help me won't you?

I will get a raise of around 2300. for earning my masters. (I already receive the +15 stipend).
The masters will cost OVER 26K.and that doesn't include my time commitment. It doesn't include the amount of anxiety I have over learning the SAME SHIT, I have known for 23 years!!! (Excuse my language, I am horrified today..)
I can retire in 9 years.   9 X 2300.oo = 20, 700.00
Is it worth it? Does the amount of work I am pouring into this program equal the pay raise? Now, lets' not forget that NOW THAT MY SCHOOL HAS DEEMED me ineligible  for the TEACHgrant, I have to pay back the entire amount with interest. HELL NO!!!

So this winds me back to my original position.
Is this my breaking point? Or is this a plain and simply ole fashioned mid life crisis?
Do I walk on my graduate  program? (A program that, BTW I was not truly interested in) We all know I want to actually learn something new. I want to study overseas, I want to learn Russian History...

Honestly, I don't want a red corvette, I don't want a young a fabulous boy toy..Ya know what I want? I want the world to make sense. I want to learn NEW information when I am paying 2500. per course, I want Kanye to fall off a bridge, I want Putin to be caught in a glorious homosexual fiasco, I want Ted Cruz and his crazy ass father, Rafael Cruz to stop acting like they represent ANYONE in this country..And they can join Kanye on the edge of that bridge, I'll push 'em..


AAAAhhh, let the world make sense. Let me be in the moment again. Let me be that girl who wasn't afraid to take the biggest leap of faith and adopt..Twice,... Lord, I beg you to help me find my way. Cause friends, this weekend's Krap Sandwhich has really thrown a hitch in my giddy-up!


BUT LOOK, I finally have a school picture without a double chin...


That's something!!

*If anyone points out that one eye is bigger than the other one, I will ask Kanye to go get you, and then I will push you all off the bridge!