Exactly

Funny

Lately I have felt some irritation with blog etiquette. Most of the blogs I read are adoption related and recently I had one of those blog authors delete my comment. It had happened before but I thought maybe I had made an error when typing in my comment. So it got me thinking. And what I came up with is  ** the blogger world is an awful lot like the "In Real Life" world. There are those people out there who are jealous, insecure, and hold their heads way too high and it just takes some time to figure it out.. I only ever commented on this blog because I have specific information about teaching. I don't tend to give parenting advice only a technique here or there that has worked in our house.
Needless to say, I don't comment on that blog anymore. If I am honest, I don't quite relate to this blogger. There is a lot I don't  know about this particular mom, but the one thing I do know is that homeschooling is her preference. And homeschooling is something I don't think I could ever understand. I'd never want to be my girlz only source of learning. I respect the institution of education too much to put myself above it.  Anyhoo, I am glad I learned that this blogger prefers that I don't comment. It gives me time to read other bloggers who enjoy feedback.


Sometimes I see these little pics on Facebook and I laugh out loud. Let me share in case you need a laugh or two..

Tutu's

 

Saturday is the big day..Tech rehearsal yesterday..And now we prep!!

Spoiled

I mentioned earlier that my dad sold his beach house. And now, on my last day of school I am finding myself terribly sad about it. I have always gone to the beach with my girlz  in the summer. I have always removed myself from my "real life" and headed to a make believe life of fabulous wonder...And now, I am staying home and teaching summer school.

Spoiled? Yeah, I think so..

Trauma?

For some unholy reason, I am up at 6 in the morning..
And that has given me some time to sit  and ponder.
I think we should all ponder every now and again. It's good for the soul.
For me, I have been thinking a lot about trauma.
And not for my daughters as of yet. I don't know if I am being naïve or if I am just ignoring the inevitable, but I don't think my girlz are going to suffer as a result of their being adopted. As I have shared before, I am from a pretty tiny small farming town in Florida and I personally grew up with 6 friends in my direct peer group who were adopted. At that time, all of the adoptions in Florida happened with the help of Children's Home Society, not international and all at infancy.
Of those friends, I know that 2 of them have done searches for their birth family and found them. Those 2 friends had very successful results and have found an additional layer of family that they are happy to join.  The others haven't been interested in birth family searches.
What I wonder is what makes an adoptee want to search, or not.

Next year I will be a part of a group of teachers who will do a trauma study and I am hoping that the information and research will be applicable to adoption. I have never been one to assume that because my girlz were adopted that they endured trauma. I just don't buy it. Additionally, I am in the small group of people who didn't see them suffering in their orphanages.

I understand that there could have been more care, more attention, more touching, more one to one interaction. But that is the case with many bio families. I have seen it with my own eyes after 23 years in the classroom! I don't want anyone to think I am saying that orphanages are great places, I am just saying that Anna was given special care. Her caregiver wrote me letters after the adoption, so I know she was loved and cared for while in the orphanage. August was a wee bit older, and had a rigid schedule with lots of therapies and one on one interaction. Even if it was in a therapeutic setting, she was given face time and that added to her feelings of being cared for. Just as my students are. I know that some of my very students have a sense of "being loved" even if it's just during the day.
Some adoptive parents consider the "transition" from orphanage to adoptive parents as the trauma. Again, I just don't see it.
Anna who cried every time she saw me walk into her room at the orphanage stopped crying the moment we got into the car to leave. She clung to me like a spider monkey, and from that moment on, she looked to me as the person who made her STOP crying and not vice versa. Sorry for the picture quality. It just shows that Anni stopped crying. And if you look close, you can see I started crying. Tears of absolute joy. A b s o l u t e...

will continue next time...

Winding Down...

12 More Days until Summer. And I cannot wait. On a discouraging note, We had to put off our Disney Trip. We are bummed about it, but our offer of free dining starts at the end of September and I am just too worried to spend all that money on the food if we go in the summer.   I am still doing my kitchen, so I just can't make both work. We are thinking of spending Christmas at WDW. It seems so exciting, and we would save 700.oo a person on free dining, Win-Win!

So now we can plan some fun local trips. We are already set to go to Kings Dominion. I have a couple of free tix from my union, and my sister is taking a group of school students so we can do that on the cheap.  I am also planning a trip to Hershey Park. We have never been there so it should be a good time. And who doesn't love a town based solely on the chocolate bar!

Right now we are gearing up for recital season at our dance studio. We had pictures recently and although I normally don't like makeup for my girlz, it does really enhance their pale winter faces..

My camera died during Anni's picture time, so we have a sweet lil' pic of Auggie. She is so sweet in this pic.You cannot imagine how hard it was to get lipstick on those tiny little lips. I actually had to lay her down on my bed so I could line her mouth without having any movement!!

We have 3 dances for each girl in 2 different shows. Yeah, I am inhaling deep as I think about that looong day. The good news is that I will be out of school for the stage rehearsals and the actual shows.

 

 

I have been thinking about all the appointments I can catch up on during the summer.

 

*Dentist for all

*Physical Therapy for my back

*My ObGyn Yearly Exam, except I'm not really sure what they will check,

*Mammogram

 

 

This will be the first year since I became a mother that I won't be in Florida. And there is a huge sense of sadness that is lingering in my mind. I could spend the summer at Dad's river house, but it's not the same. And I really need to work this year. Although I will miss the beach terribly, I think my practical side tells me to "get over myself" and do what I need to do so that I am not put in a financial bind. Dad will visit and we can spend time at our pool, so it will be fine. The key is that we relax in the summer. I need to spend all of my time focusing on all the motherly things that are difficult during the year.

 

We aren't the type to schedule a million activities to keep my girlz busy. The beauty of both of my girlz is that they are very keen on handing out. I learned very early that it isn't going to "insert theme park/water park/movie/special place that costs money" that brings the most joy to my girlz. Honestly, it's just being together. I have said it a million times, we do it old school. Playing in the neighborhood with school friends is the highlight of the weekend, so having the chance to do that everyday will be awesome for my girlz.

 

I think we all have friends who can barely deal with their kids on a regular Saturday. These families are the ones who spend every waking hour searching for ways to entertain their little ones, so they don't have to.  It's funny that I did that one year, and I was never more miserable. What I found out later was that the girlz were fine to go, but told me, "We did it to make you happy."  And my heart broke. I thought they really wanted to be that busy.. I say these families are addicted to activity, and the children have no idea how to entertain themselves. And that leads to these addicted children saying, "I'm BORED!" a million times a day. And the worst part is that as these children get older, they can list every activity they'd like to do. Most of them cost money.

 

I got some great advice years ago. The mom said, "Don't buy something big or enroll your kids into an activity unless they beg you for it for a year!" She was right. I wanted to buy my girlz a Wii, a long time ago. They saw the commercials and just HAD to have it. The Christmas season came that year and I didn't get it for them, and once the commercials faded away, so did the girlz desire to have it.

Luckily my sister bought it and they get to play it when they go to her house. And playing it there gives them their fill of it..

 

I have non teacher friends who dread the summer. Because they have to "deal" with their kids. I am not sure if it's because I am with other people's kids all year or what, but I just don't mind it. If I am home, I think it's natural to have my girlz with me. Maybe it's because I started late and then adopted. I always feel like I have a special, different kind of love for my girlz. I don't know, maybe every mom feels this way.

 

So as we count down the days, let's all keep our fingers crossed that my hundred year old AC makes it through another HOT Nova summer!!

 

 

 

 

 

Off Topic

Wondering why you block your blog? And then visit mine?

I would think you would be proud to be moving in with someone. I would think if you love this next guy enough to post it on Face Book, you would post it to the world on your blog?

But that is just me, I am an upfront kind of girl.