Party

Today was the New Years Eve Eve party that my teammates and I have each year. This is the first year we didn't go to a restaurant to meet up.
On our team there is one young teacher who is not married, but loves our little ones. There is one teacher who has college aged girls. But she has the heebie geebies and couldn't come..

There is one teacher who is the mommy of  "L-G" who is 4 and a doll baby. My girlz adore her and think she sounds like a fairy when she talks. She is darling and  our family treats her like a little cousin!
Then there is one friend who is now teaching 2nd grade..BOOoooo..
We still invite her to everything as she misses the kindergarten so much, and we are all good friends. She has 2 sons, one is 25 months old and one is 6 months old. And those boys are amazing. She raises some smart children. (Both she and her husband are very bright) And she is the one I call a hippie child. She is the most genuine and relaxed kind of momma.

Because we exchange gifts and the kids are old enough to want to play, we decided to have our lil party at my house. There is plenty of room, and that means we can spend time together with our little ones there. I invited hubbies too, as I really love them too.. *OKAY, here is something weird. I used to teach with a music teacher at my old school. Turns out, the hippies husband is the child of that music teacher. God, I am so old.
So today was like a second Christmas. Everyone knows each other so well, that we end up with the coolest gifts. L-G's mom found a cupcake set with nesting dolls on it! And I was tickled to get our young teacher a shiny pink cupcake maker for her new condo!  The kids ran wild and played and messed, and when it was time to go, there were no tears, but even my girlz didn't want the day to end..

These are the times when I know how lucky I am to have a job where there are people who I genuinely care about. Going to work everyday would be impossible if I couldn't meet up with these ladies and talk first about our own kids, then about school stuff! (The mommies that were at the party are not on Facebook or any social media, so I won't publish any pics..Just imagine 3 little girlz, 1 toddler, 1 baby and a bunch of teachers giggling and eating a whole bunch!!)

So as this year winds down, I am really happy to be surrounded by such lovely people. And that includes my family. My mom with her constant help with the girlz, My dad with his positive encouragement and love of my girlz, and of course my crazy-ass sister who genuinely adores my babies..
Our  family Christmas was picture perfect and with everything happening in the adoption world, I am reminded once again that the dear sweet Lord blessed me when he didn't have to. And once again, I sing his praises for doing so.

I don't tend to make resolutions. I never really 'start' my year in January. My year starts in September with the school year. But this year, I would like to make a few plans.
I know I would like to be more proactive in keeping my home clean. We are a reallll hoooottt messs around here. (I have had the place cleaned for the holiday, and it is work, but I have really enjoyed it)
I would also like to keep losing weight, but actually be in charge of the process. Right now, it is just happening, so I am going to get some blood work done to make sure everything is okay, but start walking so that I can tone up..
The last thing I want to focus on, is trying to get into a small group and start going. I miss everyone at New Hope, and I would love to reconnect with them. I also miss the learning involved. I miss that.

"I cannot forecast to you the action of Russia. It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma; but perhaps there is a key. That key is Russian national interest."

So what is in the best interest of Russia? I have to say, that I honestly have no clue..I said at the time of my adoptions that the orphanages that I visited were well staffed and although the physical buildings were a hot mess, the babies seemed to get adequate care. Could there have been different ways of caring for the littlest babies, sure. Was it different than the way we do it in the U.S. sure. But what struck me the most, was the amount of bureaucracy involved in orphan care. The amount of people attached to the work of raising orphans. Departments of people dedicated solely to handling those children. It was impressive.

On my trip to finalize AugustRose's adoption, I was at the Moscow airport changing planes. It was bitter and cold, and flurries were falling. We had been in the airport for a couple of hours, so we were HOT. Our bodies were dripping with sweat. When we walked to an exterior hallway to board the bus that would take us to the domestic terminal, my mom, Anna, and I took deep fresh air breaths..The cold air felt great on our sweaty heads..We boarded the bus and were squished between tons of Russians. Immediately they began saying things about Anna not wearing her hat..I could tell. I let it all go, and it kept going. One lady tried to speak to me in her broken English to say that my Anni needed to hat. I grabbed her hat and showed the lady. She began to speak again to try and say it was cold outside..Uhmmm, hello, I knew that. I knew that my baby was sweating. She needed fresh air before we boarded the flight to Novosibirsk..But this lady kept going. And I felt attacked. So I said in a very clear voice.."Don't pretend to care about my daughter. She was here for you to care about when she was a baby, but you and everyone else on this bus ignored her when you had a real chance to care for her."
My mom was so confused. She hadn't really caught the exchange until I raised my voice to tell this woman about herself..I knew that the woman didn't truly understand what I was saying. But for some weird reason, it felt good to say it. Because it wasn't the only time I felt as though I was being frowned upon while in Russia. Once Anna would speak English, the looks of disapproval would change, but only slightly. For some reason, I always felt like Russian's weren't happy to see Americans in their country. I didn't feel that way in Khabarovsk. Ever. It was only in Moscow and Novosibirsk.
In Khabarovsk, the hotel floor ladies practiced their English on me. They were also very worried when it was too cold outside. I would assure them that I wasn't taking the baby out on those days. When they looked at Anna and I, it was as if they were proud grandmas..When we went out in town, no one seemed to care much about us. They are not an outwardly friendly people in general, so I was okay with that..I can be shy at times, so this was A0K with me.. I am not sure that other people understand that history has given the Russian's a general sour nature. When I was in Moscow with the both girlz, my coordinator was so lovely and genuine that I honestly wished we could be friends forever. Her daughter was another adoption related worker, and the 2 Anna's made our time in Moscow so easy that it was hard to believe.

My adoption experiences were just like anything else. Good one minute, horrible the next, hysterical at other minutes..But what colored my experiences the most was the absolute joy I felt from the child I was in Russia to adopt. That is what I focused on, so that is what was most important.

I have to say that part of me does understand Putin. His sour nature brings him to punish America with what matters the most. People.
Every American adoption agency has someone in Russia working on their behalf, and each one of them developed that same sour nature. And each one of them punished Americans a little along the way. And why? Because they knew we would pay any "foreign fee*" asked for just to get our babies home..

I am very confused today. Wondering if it could actually be a good thing to let Putin take care of his own children...Who knows. But for now, I just sit with a WTH look on my face..


*FOREIGN FEE
An amount of money given to the Russian coordinator..NOT given to the orphanage. This fee was usually 15,000. This money could not be traced to anything specific.
Yes, I have paid it twice.

Beyond Blessed

This is what Russian orphans look like once they are home. We are nothing too special, but what we are is a family. I am mortified at the thought that someone else in the USA won't be able to post this kind of "happy kid" picture..Pray for those families who have just had their dream of a family shattered today. I am beyond blessed, and I know it. I hope for peace tonight for those broken hearted families...

Blame is All Around

Who can I blame for this crime against the littlest of souls?

Let's start with OUR government. So why choose Sergie Magnitsky to rally around. Why him? There is a load of money behind what he discovered, and more than likely it falls on our side to have had this guy's information...I mean come on, why didn't we step up when any number of high profile murders have occurred in Russia over the last decade..
So the Sergei Magnitsky Act denies visas to Russian officials involved in the prosecution and death of a Russian lawyer and whistle blower who called attention to alleged official corruption. Really? That is what the Russians are mad about? Unless they fear their entire government is somehow involved, (WHICH THEY ARE) why worry? Their pride and nationalism is really becoming extensive isn't it?
When Anna Politkovskaya was murdered for writing about Chechnya, why didn't we act?
And when the editor of Forbes Magazine, Russia was killed, why didn't move? Why? I will tell you. Because it didn't serve us at all. And why? Because although most people whisper that they know PutiPoot is behind many of these murders, most people aren't brave enough to say it loudly..And in America, we act only when it makes us money..So now, thank you very much to the committee that decided NOW is the time to act..You just stood up to Putipoot, and ya pissed him off. So now, he's going to cut his own nose to spite his face...And that happens by hurting his own orphans and the few families who are willing to pay the enormous fees to adopt them...


BUT,
 if I can't blame our government, I move on to the guy in my very own part of the world who was soo unaffected by the adoption of his child that he put the infant in the car and went to work.. And yes, the child died of heat exposure. The law that is currently in play is called the Magnitsky-retaliation law in response to the case of  Miles Harrison of Purcellville, Va who was aquitted for leaving his poor baby in the car to die..I bet his fat ass didn't forget his breakfast that day. So what you are remorseful. So what you are sorry..Dumbass. So thank you very much for putting America on the map for being bad parents...

But maybe I will throw a little blame to the woman, Torry Ann Hansen, who acted with her own mother to put her adopted child on a plane alone to Moscow. TO RETURN HIM...Yes, there wasn't enough love there, so she sent him back. Thank you very much dumb ass. I would like to add a little giggle that she has to pay 150K for his child support..AS IF ANY ORPHAN in Russia is getting 150K worth of care from birth to 18..I giggle again because she is paying for her mistakes, literally..

I have to throw some blame at the agencies, and "regional coordinators" who have made millions on the backs of people like me..I personally name Aleksandr Smuckler and Aleksandr Melnikov for screwing over so many families that those families refused to do Post Placement Reports..And because of this, adoptions went unchecked for way too long..But guess what? Smukler is living in a FAT HOUSE in Jersey and sent his 3 sons to the best private schools..He is the current president of the NCSJ and has forgotten his horribly unethical ways of strong arming adoptive families..But I haven't forgotten. And because I am a super stealth Internet user, I know as much about him as he USED to know about me..I am not afraid anymore to call him out. He is was a real dick to more families than you can imagine, and this kind of 'tomfoolery' has played a huge role in the Russian government frowning at Americans adopting.. Check him out, his friends call him Sasha..
http://www.ncsj.org/

So on our side of the pond, I blame idiot government decisions, and idiot individuals, and the Russian Mafia right here in the good ole USA..Any adoptive family relies on the success of the families who adopt before us..And there are some real gems out there..
I have to wonder what families are thinking when they adopt children..Are they wanting to create a family or are they just feeding their ego? Sadly, there are a lot of egos on the blogger world..Just look around at all the heroes out there..

Now as for Putipoot, he seems like the spawn of Donald Rumsfeld and Dick Cheney. Yes he is that evil. Throw a little FSB training in there and you have one badass M-Effer. He is willing to level Chechnya in order to gain access to that sweet oil spot. He is willing to put on Mock criminal trials for people such as Russian oil billionaire Mikhail Khodorkovsky just to scare the shit out of the original oligarchs, and to set the tone for any future money makers.."Don't eff with the government, and we won't kill you."

So blame is all around.
And tonight, I am just pissed that somewhere out there, a single woman is terrified that she won't be adopting from Russia. I am pissed that a truly deserving family is going to be without the child they met..I am sad that so many Russian orphans will be in the DetskyDom another night without any hope that a family will come along to adopt them, at least not an American one..
I am pissed at all those HEROES who adopted children they knew they couldn't parent..

So, when someone says to you,"What's the big deal, it's not our country, they are not our orphans." You can tell them, "No they aren't, but it is important to someone I know.."

The Day After..

It all fell into place. Nowhere to go, family in the house, food on the table, toys ALL OVER THE PLACE! Now my finely tuned home looks like a finely tuned Mess..But we let it stay that way.. The girlz loved all of their treats. And I loved not having to stop and go anywhere.


      We didn't go to the Gaylord this year. It just didn't come together and quite honestly, we have gone every year so I wasn't looking forward to seeing the same characters, the same ICE show, and ice skating in the same tiny rink..It is fun, but we have done it enough to know it all by heart.. My dad and sister cooked Christmas Lunch and I got to sit outside with the dogs and the girlz while August tried out her new scooter. It was a total pajama day.

     Our family has really come full circle. After years of struggle to enjoy the events that each of us plans, we have finally found a way to focus on just being together. I have a tendency to over plan events. (Church, Gaylord, Ice Skating, Eve Dinner) And then, have trouble keeping everyone "in the moment" and enjoying those rituals..The girlz love whatever. Honestly. We found a funky version of the YULE LOG on tv and that seemed to make our time around the tree all the more special..

    Now today in the afterglow of Christmas, we are straightening up, going to ToysRUs for yet more Christmas buying, and then heading over to my sister's house for the night. She is having foot surgery and has to be in Maryland at 7 AM, so we are going to stay there to have less of a drive. My dad will stay here and pack up his stuff. He will visit my sis once she is home and then he is heading back to Florida. He has several job opportunities to prepare for..His retirement is the busiest I have ever heard of. He has moved everything from the beach house to his storage, but needs to get it more organized if he is going to be in Lebanon for any length of time.. So I sit here on my bed with our little baby Perrywinkle. She is so tiny, but very smart. She already tinkles on her pee-pee pad, and I am guessing she will be easy to transition to going outside more once she gets a little bigger. (The fact that she is 2 pounds means I am worried to let her out in the weather too much) The girlz have had ear buds in their ears since yesterday. AugustRose LOVES her IpodTouch. And Anna loves her Iphone. I knew they would. Music, videos, and games all within the touch of their little hands..They sit side by side and just giggle at videos they have found. I worried that they may go off on their own, but oddly enough they sit side by side. AugustRose trusts Anna to help her navigate her way around her IpodTouch, and Anna loves being the helper. I took all of 1 picture on Eve and Christmas Day. I just get into the moment and forget. My sister took a few, so I am borrowing hers. We now have tons of videos but with this new blogger format means I have forgotten how to get them up..But I will try.. For now, I leave you with a video of our little girl..

Happy Holiday! 

simple bliss... The girlz stayed at my sister's house last night. (my dad did too) I got all of my last minute details finished up and the house cleaned. Yeah! This morning, I went to get the puppy. And Oh My Lord...She is 2 pounds. YES, 2 pounds. Her coat/jacket is way too big, but an extra small. Her pajamas fit thank goodness. My house tends to be drafty, so we keep them in it all the time. I presented the puppy by: bringing her down in our Bitty Baby crib, and I told the girlz I wanted to get rid of the crib. The girlz both said, "Nooo, let's keep it." Then I just put the crib down. The puppy is so small that they didn't notice her at first. Then they both noticed her and Anna burst into tears. (As I predicted, and told my mom ahead of time.) And I have heard a million times, that how happy the girlz are for their Christmas puppy. Her name is: Perrywinkle Mistletoe Green.................... Perry for short! Hope you all are having a great Eve. We are in our jammies and finished making cookies. And the truest Christmas miracle is that I have cooked all day. We will be in bed shortly and then mommy gets busy with playing Mrs. Santa.. Happy Eve and Happier Christmas!

This is my sister's million pound dog Oliver playing ever so gently with Perrywinkle1

Keeping It Simple at New Hope Church

Some of you may remember I got my feelings hurt last year at Church. This year, my Church isn't having services on Christmas Eve. I am so glad about it. The staff works so hard already, and the fact that Christmas Eve falls so close to Sunday services, it was decided not to have an additional Eve service. It was a relief for many. This will be the first year that the Pastor, The SCHLEYER crew, and all of the Volunteers can wake up at a reasonable hour and spend the day with their families. The message was to Keep It Simple! Normally, we have one Saturday service but yesterday we had two. I was the children's helper in the 7:30 service. All of the children were invited up to sing along with the band and then sit at the base of the stage for most of the service. There wasn't a children's service, so all the children were in the auditorium. And the message of Keeping It Simple really hit home. Although I go way overboard with the decorations, and maybe even the gifts, I am keeping it more simple this year. In a lot of other ways. I eliminated the fried who drained our emotional resources, and now I don't allow myself to worry about all of that drama. And that is huge. Only having my own family to focus on makes life more simple. I still end up hearing about it second hand, but only in a counselor sort of way. And that is not too much. THe girlz and my dad are over at my sister's house for today and I am going to get the last minute details taken cared of... I am getting the puppy in a bit so look for a puppy post later!!!