Summer Update

So we have been in Florida for a little over a month now. And I gotta say, It is just as good as it has ever been. We traveled up to Saint Augustine to go to our family reunion a week ago and had a fabulous time. It is sort of like shoving a mini-vacation into our summer holiday.
For those who don't care much for beaches, this is your kind of town. There are tons of historical spots to visit and a precious downtown area for shopping and people watching. We have visited most of the historical spots in years past, so this year I planned a trip to Marine Land for Anna's 9th birthday treat! We went to a dolphin research center when Anna was 5 and that is where she threw her very first EPIC-giant-"Oh my God, I don't know this kid" sort of fit..
(Back story: Anna was too young to swim with the dolphins, so we paid for her to have a meet and greet with a dolphin. When it was over, she wanted to swim with her dolphin, and all but threw herself into the sea to be with the dolphin. And as luck would have it, there was an audience watching Anni and her little sister. I guess the people visiting thought it was cute to see 2 little gals touching and feeding a dolphin. Boy were they surprised when they saw Anna lay herself on the dock and try to boodie scoot herself into the water. August seeing Anna very near the water felt She should be there, so she also threw herself on the dock and did her Russian best to get into the water. It was amusing as hell to the audience who clapped and laughed, but it was one of those rare times when I gave pause and considered just kicking both of my precious girlz into the water..But I didn't. And that is when Anna began a two hour screaming fit shouting, "I need to get in the water."   Yeah, all the way from the upper Keys, to Miami.)
OK, so given the back story, I knew that Anna would much love the dolphin experience at Marine Land. Because of the huge expense, (400.00 has never been so worth it!) Anni didn't have a birthday party. She was totally fine with it. August said she wanted to do it also, but I know my girlz. August would stand on the water's edge and say, "Yeah, Hell no am I doing this." so I chose the Feed, Touch, and Paint program for her.

We traveled up to S.A. and had a day with the Green family. It is so amazing to see everyone. We  meet at my cousin Kelly's house. She and her sister are a lot like my sister and I. Kim has children and even grandchildren now and Kelly doesn't have any. She just loves on her nieces and nephew. They do a great job of planning the party and making everyone feel at home. Kelly has the best pool and lives on the bay side of the beach so everyone who goes gets a little mini-vacay. My dad is one of 8 children so there are many cousins for my girlz to play with.
We stay just down the road from my cousin's house and my sister flew in from DC to be there..

Our Marine Land visit was beyond worth the money. My neighbor told Anna, "Your mom is rich. She pays for you to do a lot in the summer." I had to share some basic economics with my girlz so that they know this is NOT the case. I plan, plot, and scheme to put away money for special events. Single motherhood and rich NEVER go together. I don't want my girlz to think of themselves as wealthy or spoiled so I shared with them the basics of how to save for a summer of "special birthday" treats. I reminded them that our SUV is almost 8 years old. I reminded them that we shop for many items at thrift stores. I reminded them that we only plan a couple of trips a year. I reminded them that although we want a pet of some sort, it takes planning. Mostly financial planning so that we are ready when the time comes. The are pretty clear on the fact that Mommy is not quick to make any big purchases, and although we spend a big amount of money on trips, we have planned them at least a year in advance..

Okay back to Dolphin Day. August and Aunti did the painting first. It was a perfect program. Although my lil' Auggie seemed excited to be with the dolphins, I could see there was NO WAY she would have gotten in with the dolphins.
Anna and I got to swim the dolphins. And let me tell you. It was amazing. One day I am going to write a book on water/swim/ocean time as an alternative bonding therapy. And if I did write the book, dolphin therapy would be at the top of my list. It was the most precious thing I have done with Anna. The joy on her face, the love in hear heart, the excitement of the process was too much. I was teary eyed for much of the event, but then the dolphin would come up to us and I could only joy in my heart.   Twice while in the deep water, the dolphin would swim away do some sort of trick and then instead of returning to the trainer, it would swim up to Anna and I and allow us to give it it's "reward rub."   We knew this wasn't what she was supposed to do, but we loved it. The trainer would end up swimming up to us and move the dolphin away from us and back to the middle of the pool..
It was an awesome time and I highly suggest it to anyone with children who need a birthday treat!


There is much to share about my job. But I won't muddy up my happy post with the "Icccckkkk" that is FCPS. Just can't even allow myself to think about it right now..So I will leave you with some pretty pictures!!






Aunti and AugustRose painting, touching, and feeding their dolphin Dazzle and Roxy!

Anni and I during our Dolphin Experience!

Birthday

So today is Anni's 9th and I had to post this, more for my own memory..I can guess this isn't stuff Pulitzer's are made of!

So what does a 9 year old pick out for her birthday cake? Usually we have a party so the cake goes along with the theme. This year, we aren't doing a party with friends so as I was planning to go pick out a small cake she said she wanted to go and pick it out..So, we went to one of my favorite places, the Publix down the road and headed for the bakery..There were many cute mini cakes that would have been perfect. But she headed to the pies, and what does she see? A key lime pie..Hmmm...And then her other favorite, a cookies and cream pie..Hmmmm? Difficult troubles..THEN, we see what must be a mini miracle, we see each pie sold in halves...So she looks up at me and smiles and says, "Can we Momma?" I think you know the answer!
So we started with this...

And after Anna made a few modifications,  added candles, and fire, we ended up with .....

 It may look like a mess of a cake, and maybe it was, but we were happy with it!

     Auggie picked out the cutest little diary with an M on it..It had a cute glittery pen and book mark, as well as a sparkly LOCK! Go ahead Anni, put your secrets in that sucker. Momma knows how to pick a lock! Anni and Augg were in the sweetest "thank you hug" here!



Right now, Anni is very into DS..I can only say, it has come in handy while her computer is down..Sadly, the duck tape stopped holding it together and we are trying to get it repaired. She got lots of little odds and ends  and games to go with her DS. She loves to organize her stuff. Yeah, until we get home and she has to organize her room!





And here is a horrible picture of me at the pool during a night time swim..It proves I am actually at the beach with my girlz..(Single motherhood sucks when trying to actually get into a photograph!)

Florida

So after a 2 day drive, we made it to Florida. I have to say, my girlz are awesome travelers. I have this lil system of putting those fabric shopping bags around the headrests and I fill them with treats and books and little crafty things they can do in the car. And it works!
We didn't have one argument the whole two days in the car. Again, my girlz love to travel so they are in their bestest of moods. Me, on the other hand. I wanted to pull over at every rest stop, truck stop, or Welcome station and sleep or cry..

I found out once I got here that I didn't get the transfer to the school I wanted. It was hard to be upset. Starring at the ocean with my girlz in the sea sort of takes the sting out of it.  I sent my resume to one final school for a last ditch effort to try and get a school closer to my home. I have no faith in the transfer system, but again, there is the whole ocean, pool, sunshine that is keeping my hopes in a different place. Having less drama in my life has made a world of good. I have focused on the 2 little girlz in my heart and put the rest of the world out of my mind.

Anni's birthday is tomorrow. My blessed lil one will be 9. My mom always says the time is flying by. But for me, it isn't. I try very hard to "sit" in the moments and allow them to linger. Although it's been 8 years since Anni came home, she is still that same lil' bald headed baby to me. She makes the same expressions and even has the same giggle she had as an infant. Her heart is still the same. She is empathetic and caring, as well as silly and smart. She is not a typical big sister in that she doesn't take control and try to boss AugustRose. I love her so! This year she didn't have a birthday party. We are finally doing the thing she has wanted to do for years. Swimming with the dolphins. Our family reunion is in St. Augustine and Marine Land is there. So we will be doing that as Anni's special treat this year.

Florida is so good for my soul. Everything I am not during the school year, I can be during the summer. I make hot breakfasts and lunches. I read every night to the girlz. This summer we have added an exercise routing into our day. We wall to the beach each morning, and take a fast paced stroll along the sand before we get into the ocean..I am trying to lose at least ten pounds just being more active. Anni is getting too chubby in her tummy so I want her to get a little more fit. She has it tough being a vegetarian. She eats veggies but adds the dreaded CHEESE to everything so her food intake is full of calories. We are adding a 3rd dance class next year to get her into better shape so that will help.
We are working on AugustRose's patience and confidence this summer. She has so many "worries" and I cringe every time I hear her say, "Can I have one too?"  And this applies to almost everything. I give Anni a snack, and before I can put August's down, she asks for one..Somehow she has lost the feeling of absolute security. She must feel like I may not give to her what I give to Anni. My dad and I were talking and it's weird that she would be this way, because Anni always gives into her when there is a battle to "have" something. AugustRose always seems to get her way. So we are working on her understanding fairness and patience.. Summer is the perfect time for that kind of refresher..

We finished our first read a loud, and now we are well into Cricket in Times Square. The girlz love it since they know so much about NYC. It is one of my all time favorite children's books. Last night we had a night time swim, and we did our read a loud there. It is amazing to do this for my own girlz.

We had an amazing 4th of July. We went down to the beach and set up our spot and hung out. We brought snacks and drinks and walked the beach with dolphins in the ocean the whole time. My dad was so happy to be with us. It is becoming my favorite holiday. No gifts to buy, no big fancy meals. Just family and snacks on the sand and a great fireworks show at the end.

Framed

I have begun to re-read the book, the 5 Love Languages of Children again. I started it a couple of times, skimmed it and never really gave the book the credit it deserved. So I have begun again to really put my head and heart into it. What I thought would be crystal clear is starting to be a wee bit cloudy as I try to narrow down each of the love languages of my girlz. Just like the book written about adults, the children's version helps parents to find the keys to that magical question: Does my child feel loved?
(from the cover)



Want to know the secede to making sure your child feels loved?
Kids desperately need to know how much you love them. But if you don't know their special "love languages," you might as well be speaking gibberish. Every child expresses and receives love best through one of the five communication styles.

• Quality Time
• Words of Affirmation
• Gifts
• Acts of Service
• Physical Touch

If your love language is different from your children's you'd better learn to translate-fast. Or you could miss your chance to meet their deepest emotional needs. Discover how to express unconditional feeling of respect, affection and commitment that will resonate in their souls - and inspire them for the rest of their lives.

Sounds good huh? I highly suggest it for adoptive and bio parents. We all do our absolute best to love our children. But if we don't educate ourselves on what our children truly need, then we can't be 100% sure that our hugs and kisses or our gifts or our words are really hitting the mark. It's a chance I don't want to take!

 And because I am saddled with the heaviest case of ADD lately, the book got me thinking about what I show my girlz. Not like TV or movies, but what I DO, and what that is showing them.
Firstly, I smoke. Yes, a dirt bag, disgusting habit. And as soon as I get to Florida, I am quitting again. It's easier there. I mean come on, it's freakin' paradise, everything is easier there. Smoking shows the children that I depend on something dangerous. And I hate that they worry about it's health effects.

 But back to what I am getting at, I am on the computer too much, and that is one area, where I want to ease up on. Given the choice, my girlz love to play outside. It actually is a blessing, as they are out til dark pretty much every night. So it's not as if they would chose to play on the pooter rather than play with friends outside, but both girlz prefer it to, let's say, picking up a book... And I am not showing them the importance of reading. (I read like a crazy person during the summer, but during the school year, not so much)

And that line of thought led me to think about how I am  too much value on the way the girlz look.
I don't pick out their clothes each day, and I am lucky if AugustRose wears underwear to Church, but I question myself because I am forever hanging photographs of the girlz on the walls, and when they are dolled up, I take photos.
So this week, as we are  packing for Florida and cleaning from baseboards to ceilings, I decided to hang up their end of the year testing scores. By the way, my big girl rec'd pass advanced on 3 out of 4 of her state required SOL tests. And in science, she only missed 1 question! Little AugustRose scored nearly perfect on the Pals test. It felt good to show the girlz their framed tests. I want them to know how much I value their schoolwork. I want them to look at those results each day and know that not only does Mommy love a cute smile in a photograph, but Mommy also loves a job well done at school.

I think it is critical to show young girlz that it is not about their looks and the right pose in a photograph. In my eyes, it's never to early to set the bar high and praise them for all of their academic efforts.

              Anni's SOL scores and the medal she rec'd at school for doing so well on the tests.

As I said earlier, I read non-stop in the summer. I love the smell of books, and because I have the time, I crave reading. Normally I read around 10 to 15 books in a summer. The ADD is usually overtaken by OCD and instead of washing my hands a thousand times a day, I read! But the change this year is that I am going to read my own books, and at night I will read to the girlz. We have never read a chapter book aloud as a family. I chose my favorite book George Seldon's Cricket in Times Square as an anchor book. But I won't start with it. We will start with Harry Kitten and Tucker Mouse. Cricket in Times Square will be next. Then Tucker's Countryside.
I look forward to August learning how to listen to a story that doesn't end in one night. I love it when the girlz look at the words as I am reading them. Their eyes following along on the page. At August's age, she will just fast enough to follow, but not fast enough to go ahead of me.
I am going to let the girlz make one diorama at the end of reading all 3 stories. Since each of them connects to the other, it won't be hard to do. And you know lil kids love a project!

It's been a long year, and boy oh boy I am glad it's over! But now, it's a fresh new day, and summer is here, We leave for Florida on Monday so Life is grand!

.

Ssshhhh!

Today is make it break it day. I have an interview with my dream school. I got up and said my prayers. Now I have to get ready.
Oh, I shouldn't be up this early because it only 11 minutes to get there.

I am so nervous. I haven't beent his nervous to interview for a very long time. Good sign? I don't know. But the fact that I could be home to get my girlz off the bus everyday if I were to get this job makes it perfect.

Send me good vibes blogger world!!

Welcome Heart

It's been a few months, and I have really missed writing. I have truly  felt like my life has been on hold waiting for a PlanBee to come along. And it never did. To top it off, I have been sort of stuck in the middle of a situation that has kept my heart on hold. Hold that thought though, I'll explain it later...

 

to my new blog!

But today, the Saturday after my last day with students, I feel like I have really found my path again. And oddly the path is right outside my door. Teaching in Russia is out. And even if I were to get a job there, it wouldn't make sense to go. My mom had a mild stroke a few months ago, and with the ability to get her to a hospital and have quick care, she is just fine. Not sure I would have gotten that in Russia. And then there's my dad. He comes up from Florida about every other weekend. Yep, you heard that right. What I find so funny is before I had children he came up about 3 times a year..Now I am not saying he doesn't love my sister and I, I am just saying that my daughters have made him waayyyy more eager to get here! Just sayin!

I can't forget about Auntie..She is really trying to get back to her path too. After going through her breakup with her girlfriend of 3 years, she has thrown herself into work and family. And it has really helped her to recover. She has been taking the girlz for overnight stays a whole bunch. I can't believe I am saying this, but I really need time away from the girlz. Yes. I said it. Single moms need a break sometimes..And sending them to boot camp isn't an option yet. Believe me, I checked into it..

I haven't felt like myself for about 2 years because of a situation that I have been in the middle of. My dearest friend and her husband have been going through a bitter divorce and somehow I found myself square in the middle of it. I used to admire this couple as "having it all." A beautiful blended family of bio and adopted, a lovely home, hard work and Lot's of fun family activity. Then it all fell apart. I found myself supporting my friend even though it was her that wanted the divorce. I won't go into all the details, let's just say it was awful. I think I fell into the role of "the single friend with the door always open." My advice was sound and in line with the beliefs of the Church, but it was never followed. And the fall out was brutal. My dear friend lost her children in the custody fight. She lost the house as she was the one who left. Everything in that lovely home was gone. She was left to start over and recreate a life for her children. And like so many children of divorce, they had figured out the basics of the divorce and wanted nothing but to stay in the home with their dad, in the life they had always known. Instead of enjoying time in two places, the children are anxious and worrisome while with my dear friend. Throw in the boyfriend at my dear friends home, and it is a nest of confusion and worry.
It is so hard when you see someone throwing their life away. Because there is always fall out.
So recently I removed myself from the mess. It was the hardest thing I have had to do in a while. But I already feel a weight lifted. For two years I felt like an unqualified counselor who was supposed to help this person make the right decisions. Yet she didn't. So I can't do it anymore.
So that is the "heaviness" that I have been dealing with.

But there is so much goodness. I tried to get a job teaching with the DoD. I didn't get my head or hopes too far into it. They are downsizing so many bases, and truly I never wanted to teach in Germany or Japan. It was always Russia. But after the past two years, I actually wrapped my head around the fact that my dreams have to come secondary to what my daughters need and want..Russia wouldn't allow for ballet, tap, neighborhood play, chasing fireflies, end of the year pizza parties on a blanket with the kids from our block, good health care at the drop of a hat,  family at my door everyday, and the ease of life in America.

This year was a tough teaching year. And after Monday, I will share a bit about what is planned for what is coming up, but mummmmms the word as of now.

Beach-House Summer is almost here. Three teacher days and I am finished. Then I head to Florida for the most amazing time of our year. At heart, I am still a Florida girl. A girl who would drive to the beach and sit and stare when I needed a quiet place to pray. I am blessed to have that as an adult too.
The girlz really need that family time too. Most of the time Dad is with us, but we do get our private girlie time to be 3..and swim together, and stare at the horizon and watch the dolphins swim by. And float on rafts and just be quiet together. And play "balance on the noodle" in the pool. And sit on the Lanai with our computers and watch videos. And see family at our reunion. And laugh and play with cousins at Kelly and Kim's. And watch fireworks at the Naples Pier. And take so many pictures that Facebook want to kick me off..And go to Aunt Lee's and laugh like crazy with BabySnooks.And be country girlz for a while...And time for me to rededicate my life to Christ and being a better person..

(This reminds me of my 2 Little Russian Girlz)

So I promise to post more about the topics I mention before. But I want to start with this lil tidbit. I know it will offend some of you. But in a world where most families can barely afford to feed and clothe their children, does it make sense to have more than 3 or 4 kids. Is it the smartest thing to ask for money to adopt? Hmmm..Makes me wonder. And I wonder as a single mom who doesn't have the benefit of help from government. I work hard as hell and can't be a stay at home mom..Just some things to think about before I post in the future...Betcha want to hear something juicy huh?
                        

Still in Beta Mode with the blog..Just trying to work out some lil' tidbits before I share this blog! This is another test post...