http://aistday.ru/journal/vnd20072.pdf
Novosibirsk has always tried...
Even as a baby, she was my Strawberry Girl!
Sunday, April 21, 2013
Saturday, April 20, 2013
Russian Embassy
Because the news that the Boston Bomber is Russian, everyone asks me, "So what do you think?" I sort of want to choke people when they ask, but I see why they'd do it..
Right now, I am not making a comment.
What I know is that the bombers country of origin is not actually Russian..Or in my mind it's not..
But I will chat about that, and all that it entails later.
What I can say is that the parents of these two thugs have already blamed the U.S. for this. They have already said it's a frame up..
Parents, this is where we all have to really look at our teenage or young adult children. What are they doing? Do you really know what they are up to?
We just got back from Cradle of Hope's Easter Party. It was a bit different than before, but sadly not as good. Last time they had lots of crafts upstairs, and little activities. This year they had a drawing table, and that's it. There was a table of toys and books for sale. But nothing really Russiany. There was a show put on by the Embassy school. It was really cute this year. Lot's of Michael Jackson songs..Odd yes. The theme revolved around a peaceful earth, so of course they put on a rendition of The Wizard of Oz. And if you wondered if they played Fifty Cents' "CandyShop" within the play, you'd be right! I am sure you also wondered if they somehow weaved 2 Indians and an Egyptian Princess into the play..So let me share with you, they did!
For the first time, I got to see the pool and the gym used for the school children. It was a beautiful day and I saw the school, from the area where the food is served. I also met up with an old acquaintance. When I began my adoption with AugustRose, it was a busy time with COH. I went in to finalize my home study update, and work on a couple of documents, and I was shown 3 files. They were "off the record" but because I was paper ready, I could review them. I took home info on 3 children. One of those little girlz was at the embassy today. I remember her first because of her name. It doesn't sound too Russiany. But I have met the family a couple of times before. I also met another family from Ireland. Their daughter is Anni's age.
Overall it was a nice day out. But sad that there are no babies at the event anymore. I saw a couple of toddlers, but no more tinies like in years before. The girlz and I giggled a lot. And as I looked around, I realized how blessed I am. I am sure that many of the families there feel equally as blessed.
For the first time I left feeling like I won't go back for a while. That feeling of familiarity to the adoption world is gone.
Right now, I am not making a comment.
What I know is that the bombers country of origin is not actually Russian..Or in my mind it's not..
But I will chat about that, and all that it entails later.
What I can say is that the parents of these two thugs have already blamed the U.S. for this. They have already said it's a frame up..
Parents, this is where we all have to really look at our teenage or young adult children. What are they doing? Do you really know what they are up to?
We just got back from Cradle of Hope's Easter Party. It was a bit different than before, but sadly not as good. Last time they had lots of crafts upstairs, and little activities. This year they had a drawing table, and that's it. There was a table of toys and books for sale. But nothing really Russiany. There was a show put on by the Embassy school. It was really cute this year. Lot's of Michael Jackson songs..Odd yes. The theme revolved around a peaceful earth, so of course they put on a rendition of The Wizard of Oz. And if you wondered if they played Fifty Cents' "CandyShop" within the play, you'd be right! I am sure you also wondered if they somehow weaved 2 Indians and an Egyptian Princess into the play..So let me share with you, they did!
For the first time, I got to see the pool and the gym used for the school children. It was a beautiful day and I saw the school, from the area where the food is served. I also met up with an old acquaintance. When I began my adoption with AugustRose, it was a busy time with COH. I went in to finalize my home study update, and work on a couple of documents, and I was shown 3 files. They were "off the record" but because I was paper ready, I could review them. I took home info on 3 children. One of those little girlz was at the embassy today. I remember her first because of her name. It doesn't sound too Russiany. But I have met the family a couple of times before. I also met another family from Ireland. Their daughter is Anni's age.
Overall it was a nice day out. But sad that there are no babies at the event anymore. I saw a couple of toddlers, but no more tinies like in years before. The girlz and I giggled a lot. And as I looked around, I realized how blessed I am. I am sure that many of the families there feel equally as blessed.
For the first time I left feeling like I won't go back for a while. That feeling of familiarity to the adoption world is gone.
Thursday, April 18, 2013
The Old and the Young
It's Report Card time, so needless to say, I am a wreck of worry and confusion as I try to formulate little words and letters into a formal document fit for FCPS...It is the saddest thing I have ever seen. Standards based reporting for children who need an entire year to learn the language, let alone to count to 100 by one and backwards from 50...Just sad.
This is my best class in a very long time and I want to tell their parents, "HEY, they are reading and writing, they are memorizing poems, and figure out complex GT based word problems, they are well behaved and motivated to be GOOD, and kind..
Ahhh, but not the case for the report cards we now have.. It is important to check the appropriate box and only give one of the approved comments. Which by the way are organized about as well as my craft closet.. So the past few days I have been very blue. Blue at the state of affairs in the schools lately. I am not alone. Not by a long shot. Young teachers tootle along and think this is the way to do it.. Search and assess, means missing the essence of who a child is. And what is more important than what they can do, is, Who They Are.. And we are fighting a battle between young and old. Young feeling as if those of us who have been around a while just never found the "right" way to teach.. Young feeling congratulatory to each other when they fill out the latest grid/matrix which tells them nothing but what that child could regurgitate that day.. The old hoping desperately that no one notices that said grid/matrix wasn't completed; because that day we had to complete a retelling bear that their favorite other teacher friend did.. And it was way more fun..
I woke up this morning thinking about young and old. Laughing that I am in the old group. Laughing that although I have been in the class for 22 years, I have people doubting me simply because I refuse to buy the company line. Reason being, I bought the company line in 1992 when we implemented the "15-To-1" program. In 1996 I bought into the idea of pull out programs. In 1999 I bought into Core Knowledge. In 2000 I bought into Words their Way. In 2004 I bought into Lucy Caulkins.
But slowly and mysteriously through the myriad of programs thrown our way, whether it be working with a small group or large, I found out what works. I found out that I have the gift of sharing information. I found out that through sharing personal stories and my favorite books, that I can hold the attention of young children. I can review information in a way that small ones find interesting. I can secretly inflict my own personal "manners" beliefs on my small ones and they gladly buy into it. Over time, I feel like I know the children. And over time, through decades of relied upon evaluations, I can know what they know without needing an 8 page checklist. I can reteach and reach deeper for those who need it. One who has worked with 5 year olds for 22 years, KNOWS.
But the young ones are the ones towing the line. They won't stand with us to say, "This is nonsense."
And this is where I am. Working with line towers. Me feeling like Norma Rae. Needing to stand up on the line and shout out, "We aren't going to take it anymore..."
But I won't. I can't. The one thing about myself that I can't believe is that becoming a mother has made me very practical. Very.
I have given up the dream to live overseas. I have given up the idea of starting a business/charity. I have given up the idea of things..As much as it seems as though I have given up a lot. It's not the case. I get wayyy more than I give up. My girlz may be a pain in the ass sometimes, but they are the reason for my practicality, and I am ok with it.
Tonight is an event at my school. GAME NIGHT With all of our self inflicted search for rigor, we have chosen to have Game Night. We invite the parents to come to our school and play games. Yeah, just what I said. There has to be a better way to use our precious time with parents in the building.
BUT, at the last minute, Anna reminded me that tonight is her chorus concert. I have missed most all of their events at school. Mom goes, but this time Anni asked/begged me to go. The mistake I made is not telling my principal about it. Report cards have had me in a tizzy, so honestly, I kept thinking of emailing her, but then something would come up. So I sent it this morning.
And although I like to consider myself a rebel, I do worry that I will upset someone or they will be angry with me.
As the sun starts to rise and the birds begin their songs, it bothers me that I wake up with a nervous stomach. I should not dread my school day.
This is my best class in a very long time and I want to tell their parents, "HEY, they are reading and writing, they are memorizing poems, and figure out complex GT based word problems, they are well behaved and motivated to be GOOD, and kind..
Ahhh, but not the case for the report cards we now have.. It is important to check the appropriate box and only give one of the approved comments. Which by the way are organized about as well as my craft closet.. So the past few days I have been very blue. Blue at the state of affairs in the schools lately. I am not alone. Not by a long shot. Young teachers tootle along and think this is the way to do it.. Search and assess, means missing the essence of who a child is. And what is more important than what they can do, is, Who They Are.. And we are fighting a battle between young and old. Young feeling as if those of us who have been around a while just never found the "right" way to teach.. Young feeling congratulatory to each other when they fill out the latest grid/matrix which tells them nothing but what that child could regurgitate that day.. The old hoping desperately that no one notices that said grid/matrix wasn't completed; because that day we had to complete a retelling bear that their favorite other teacher friend did.. And it was way more fun..
I woke up this morning thinking about young and old. Laughing that I am in the old group. Laughing that although I have been in the class for 22 years, I have people doubting me simply because I refuse to buy the company line. Reason being, I bought the company line in 1992 when we implemented the "15-To-1" program. In 1996 I bought into the idea of pull out programs. In 1999 I bought into Core Knowledge. In 2000 I bought into Words their Way. In 2004 I bought into Lucy Caulkins.
But slowly and mysteriously through the myriad of programs thrown our way, whether it be working with a small group or large, I found out what works. I found out that I have the gift of sharing information. I found out that through sharing personal stories and my favorite books, that I can hold the attention of young children. I can review information in a way that small ones find interesting. I can secretly inflict my own personal "manners" beliefs on my small ones and they gladly buy into it. Over time, I feel like I know the children. And over time, through decades of relied upon evaluations, I can know what they know without needing an 8 page checklist. I can reteach and reach deeper for those who need it. One who has worked with 5 year olds for 22 years, KNOWS.
But the young ones are the ones towing the line. They won't stand with us to say, "This is nonsense."
And this is where I am. Working with line towers. Me feeling like Norma Rae. Needing to stand up on the line and shout out, "We aren't going to take it anymore..."
But I won't. I can't. The one thing about myself that I can't believe is that becoming a mother has made me very practical. Very.
I have given up the dream to live overseas. I have given up the idea of starting a business/charity. I have given up the idea of things..As much as it seems as though I have given up a lot. It's not the case. I get wayyy more than I give up. My girlz may be a pain in the ass sometimes, but they are the reason for my practicality, and I am ok with it.
Tonight is an event at my school. GAME NIGHT With all of our self inflicted search for rigor, we have chosen to have Game Night. We invite the parents to come to our school and play games. Yeah, just what I said. There has to be a better way to use our precious time with parents in the building.
BUT, at the last minute, Anna reminded me that tonight is her chorus concert. I have missed most all of their events at school. Mom goes, but this time Anni asked/begged me to go. The mistake I made is not telling my principal about it. Report cards have had me in a tizzy, so honestly, I kept thinking of emailing her, but then something would come up. So I sent it this morning.
And although I like to consider myself a rebel, I do worry that I will upset someone or they will be angry with me.
As the sun starts to rise and the birds begin their songs, it bothers me that I wake up with a nervous stomach. I should not dread my school day.
Sunday, April 14, 2013
Well, Isn't life funny?
And as I write that, please note the overlying tone of absolute disgust and sarcasm.
I have my kitchen project going and I finally made the decision to go with a very basic Ikea cabinet.
I don't care for any sort of decoration on the surface of the cabinet doors, and I love the interior fittings on the basic Ikea cabinets. They {Serbian guy and Dreadlock guy} came to measure and organize what cabinet can go where and how I can get the most out of the small space. I thought about what it most important, and realized that the counters are more important than the cabinets. And even more important than the counter is the back splash. So I decided to spend my money on those. Remember, this is a Disney year so I am on a mad dash to save money for both the kitchen and the Orlando trip.
I won't be able to do the back splash or the lighting or the flooring right now. I just don't have the cash yet. I can get the cabinets and countertops done and each month put some aside for completing it. The way I figure, I will use my tax return money next year to put in the dream back splash, flooring, and lighting...
I haven't nailed down the countertops yet..It will be one of these two..Both are sort of sparkly. Yes, kitchens need sparkle. It diverts the eye away from the tv dinners and microwaved deserts..
I have thought about doing a wallpaper back splash for now. Cause the glass subway tiles won't buy themselves. I found this and think it would be cute for a year or so..
And then we come to this week..
My AC has always been wonky. It really never worked correctly. I have had it serviced and each year the little tubes/pipes on the unit outside develop little icicles and it shuts down. Then I pour hot water over them to melt the ice. This gives us just enough cool air to get through the night. Then it starts all over again. I have never really cared to fix the AC because of the expense of it all. AND we always leave for the entire summer. By the time we would get home from my dad's beach house, the weather would be brutal for a month or so, and then fall would come along just in time to save us..
And now this.
In the Northeren Virginia area the weather has already hit brutal. Last week there was a 90 degree day. IN APRIL. Are ya kidding me? And guess what? MY AC FINALLY DIED. LIKE REALLY DIED...Not the frozen popsicle kind of died, but the whole unit stopped running. It made a sad little humming noise and that was it..
But guess what? The little nest egg I put away for my kitchen cabinets will just barely cover the cost of a new AC unit...Great, just effing great. Now I gotta figure out if I want to have a room suitable for cooking or if I want to spend the summer in my own personal bikram yoga experience.. Sometimes I just have to laugh at my own misfortune.
Thankfully this weekend was cooler than earlier in the week..And having the windows open made it quite nice. But, I know what's coming, and it ain't pretty..So I have a decision to make. My heart is just broken that I can't do the kitchen. But totally happy I don't have to beg the cash off my parents to do the AC..Times like this, I wish I had the kind of job that pays for overtime, and compensates for achievement, offers Christmas bonuses..You know, a real job.
Ok..I can't think about it anymore. I jokingly said I was going to put a paypal button on my Facebook page to see if people would fund my lavish lifestyle..Now, maybe I should put one here. I could really use the extra money, and Momma doesn't want to hit the corner for it! HAHAHAH
Have a great week ya'll..Next week is the Embassy party and I might just be bringing Dadushka..Can't wait to share the details..I am sure there will be press there..
And as I write that, please note the overlying tone of absolute disgust and sarcasm.
I have my kitchen project going and I finally made the decision to go with a very basic Ikea cabinet.
I don't care for any sort of decoration on the surface of the cabinet doors, and I love the interior fittings on the basic Ikea cabinets. They {Serbian guy and Dreadlock guy} came to measure and organize what cabinet can go where and how I can get the most out of the small space. I thought about what it most important, and realized that the counters are more important than the cabinets. And even more important than the counter is the back splash. So I decided to spend my money on those. Remember, this is a Disney year so I am on a mad dash to save money for both the kitchen and the Orlando trip.
 |
| This is as close to what I want as I can find. I want a much funkier counter, back splash, and haven't found a cabinet 'pull' that I like yet..The floor is just what I want! |
I won't be able to do the back splash or the lighting or the flooring right now. I just don't have the cash yet. I can get the cabinets and countertops done and each month put some aside for completing it. The way I figure, I will use my tax return money next year to put in the dream back splash, flooring, and lighting...
You can't tell here, but this is super sparkly when the under cabinet lighting hits it..Sparkle. All about the sparkle..
I have thought about doing a wallpaper back splash for now. Cause the glass subway tiles won't buy themselves. I found this and think it would be cute for a year or so..
And then we come to this week..
My AC has always been wonky. It really never worked correctly. I have had it serviced and each year the little tubes/pipes on the unit outside develop little icicles and it shuts down. Then I pour hot water over them to melt the ice. This gives us just enough cool air to get through the night. Then it starts all over again. I have never really cared to fix the AC because of the expense of it all. AND we always leave for the entire summer. By the time we would get home from my dad's beach house, the weather would be brutal for a month or so, and then fall would come along just in time to save us..
And now this.
In the Northeren Virginia area the weather has already hit brutal. Last week there was a 90 degree day. IN APRIL. Are ya kidding me? And guess what? MY AC FINALLY DIED. LIKE REALLY DIED...Not the frozen popsicle kind of died, but the whole unit stopped running. It made a sad little humming noise and that was it..
But guess what? The little nest egg I put away for my kitchen cabinets will just barely cover the cost of a new AC unit...Great, just effing great. Now I gotta figure out if I want to have a room suitable for cooking or if I want to spend the summer in my own personal bikram yoga experience.. Sometimes I just have to laugh at my own misfortune.
Thankfully this weekend was cooler than earlier in the week..And having the windows open made it quite nice. But, I know what's coming, and it ain't pretty..So I have a decision to make. My heart is just broken that I can't do the kitchen. But totally happy I don't have to beg the cash off my parents to do the AC..Times like this, I wish I had the kind of job that pays for overtime, and compensates for achievement, offers Christmas bonuses..You know, a real job.
Ok..I can't think about it anymore. I jokingly said I was going to put a paypal button on my Facebook page to see if people would fund my lavish lifestyle..Now, maybe I should put one here. I could really use the extra money, and Momma doesn't want to hit the corner for it! HAHAHAH
Have a great week ya'll..Next week is the Embassy party and I might just be bringing Dadushka..Can't wait to share the details..I am sure there will be press there..
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Shoulda Coulda Woulda
Holy Cow, I should have gone to Law School like I originally planned...I am totally addicted to the Jodi Arias trial..Simply hooked.
This gal stabbed her boyfriend 30 something times, shot him in the head, dragged him down the hall, and then slit his throat from ear to ear..And she sits in court as if she is offended to be there..It's amazing tv. I watch it on my phone on my breaks, and at home...
Google it, it is all over the net..
The other website I found a crazy CakeWreck site that is just hysterical..
http://www.cakewrecks.com/
You have to go look at some of the disasters on this site..The writer is also very funny! After watching the trial yesterday, I spent the evening giggling at the messes that were presented!
This gal stabbed her boyfriend 30 something times, shot him in the head, dragged him down the hall, and then slit his throat from ear to ear..And she sits in court as if she is offended to be there..It's amazing tv. I watch it on my phone on my breaks, and at home...
Google it, it is all over the net..
The other website I found a crazy CakeWreck site that is just hysterical..
http://www.cakewrecks.com/
You have to go look at some of the disasters on this site..The writer is also very funny! After watching the trial yesterday, I spent the evening giggling at the messes that were presented!
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
The Letters are Written
and yet the love is gone..And as sad as that is, ya gotta move on..
So here is my thoughts on it all...Cause NOBODY says it better than John Mayer
So here is my thoughts on it all...Cause NOBODY says it better than John Mayer
Friday, March 29, 2013
Dont Invite Me or Ask Me To
Donate to your fundraising efforts. If I don't know you, I am not one to just stroke a check. As one mom said, "IF I WANTED SOMETHING FROM 31 I would go buy it cheaper at Ross!!!" I so agree!
Don't get me wrong about charity. I believe in it. And I faithfully give to my Church every month. On many occasions, I may see a cause that I am interested in and I give. I give because my heart is drawn into giving. Adding me to your Facebook list of families who adopted in order to draw on sympathy doesn't work. I am not a sympathetic person in that way.
Adoption is so expensive. But raising a child is just as expensive. Most people I know ended up taking a loan on their house to pay for the adoption. Most people just added a couple of hundred dollars to their mortgage to pay for the upfront costs of adoption. So if you can't do that, and you don't have it in the bank, maybe you should consider adopting a child in the U.S.
I sort of got slammed on a FB page because I said its "Poor Form" to ask for money from other adoptive parents when you don't even know them..I got the "ADOPTION is rescuing a child" response..God's calling and all..BUT NO, adoption was never a calling for me. I didn't do it to be some sort of savior. I don't use adoption as some sort of platform to build points with Jesus..I adopted for ME, to become a mother. I adopted because I wanted to PARENT! I only stay in the adoption world, because I ended up falling in love with Russia. I didn't intend to love Russia. I didn't intend to be connected to it. But I am because of my fond memories and my girlz.
If Orphan Outreach is your platform then great. But the answer is NOT to adopt all the children. The answer is finding a way to educate the people of "Insert country here" to care for their special needs children without turning them into the state like defective products. And when families bring children into our country and ask for endless benefits it kills me..{Gosh I sound cold and harsh} But I can't help it. While doing my own home-study, I had to make provisions for both girlz. Provisions that were in place in case they needed additional medical care. I was told that I couldn't depend on the state and needed a plan in place to make sure I could handle it financially.
If you are wondering why the additional bitterness, I ran into an adoptive mom the other day. She shared a story of a different mom who is getting money for her child to have In-Home therapy for her attachment issues. This family also gets additional money to pay for respite care once a month. The child has been home for 8 years. In my mind, those therapies may have been picked up by the state for a while, but for 8 years?? And respite care after 8 years??
I have just never been one to depend on the state for anything. NADA. It irritates me that my tax dollars pay for this family to relax and go out of town without their child, enjoying their weekends once a month.
I know I sound a lot like Anne Colture, but I can't help it. I don't want to support your family..Where is my hand-out???
The Facebook thread that started this rant was deleted. But I got tons of private messages about my stance. All supporting the position I took.
Again, adoption is not a calling for me. It isn't something that came up while at Church. It was something that I learned about while watching a single friend at Church go through her adoption. This came at a time when I had been giving myself daily shots, taking countless meds, going to the Fertility specialist everyday during my cycle...What she was doing seemed so much more logical. My attempts were not working. I hated fertility treatments. I hated focusing on me and my body that much. I hated my husband as well. I was trying to be forgiving of his indescretions during most of the treatments. Finding out that a woman could adopt alone freed my heart. It gave me a chance to admit that I couldn't forgive him at that time of my life.
Soooooo, my point in all of this is that although I firmly agree that families should reach out to ask for prayer, wise counsel, and donations for the ORPHANAGE, I don't agree that the majority of adoption funding should come from strangers!
So, if I sound like crazy Ann C, I am sorry. I love my adoption friends and would do anything for them. I just don't like the pressure of being put on the spot...
Don't get me wrong about charity. I believe in it. And I faithfully give to my Church every month. On many occasions, I may see a cause that I am interested in and I give. I give because my heart is drawn into giving. Adding me to your Facebook list of families who adopted in order to draw on sympathy doesn't work. I am not a sympathetic person in that way.
Adoption is so expensive. But raising a child is just as expensive. Most people I know ended up taking a loan on their house to pay for the adoption. Most people just added a couple of hundred dollars to their mortgage to pay for the upfront costs of adoption. So if you can't do that, and you don't have it in the bank, maybe you should consider adopting a child in the U.S.
I sort of got slammed on a FB page because I said its "Poor Form" to ask for money from other adoptive parents when you don't even know them..I got the "ADOPTION is rescuing a child" response..God's calling and all..BUT NO, adoption was never a calling for me. I didn't do it to be some sort of savior. I don't use adoption as some sort of platform to build points with Jesus..I adopted for ME, to become a mother. I adopted because I wanted to PARENT! I only stay in the adoption world, because I ended up falling in love with Russia. I didn't intend to love Russia. I didn't intend to be connected to it. But I am because of my fond memories and my girlz.
If Orphan Outreach is your platform then great. But the answer is NOT to adopt all the children. The answer is finding a way to educate the people of "Insert country here" to care for their special needs children without turning them into the state like defective products. And when families bring children into our country and ask for endless benefits it kills me..{Gosh I sound cold and harsh} But I can't help it. While doing my own home-study, I had to make provisions for both girlz. Provisions that were in place in case they needed additional medical care. I was told that I couldn't depend on the state and needed a plan in place to make sure I could handle it financially.
If you are wondering why the additional bitterness, I ran into an adoptive mom the other day. She shared a story of a different mom who is getting money for her child to have In-Home therapy for her attachment issues. This family also gets additional money to pay for respite care once a month. The child has been home for 8 years. In my mind, those therapies may have been picked up by the state for a while, but for 8 years?? And respite care after 8 years??
I have just never been one to depend on the state for anything. NADA. It irritates me that my tax dollars pay for this family to relax and go out of town without their child, enjoying their weekends once a month.
I know I sound a lot like Anne Colture, but I can't help it. I don't want to support your family..Where is my hand-out???
The Facebook thread that started this rant was deleted. But I got tons of private messages about my stance. All supporting the position I took.
Again, adoption is not a calling for me. It isn't something that came up while at Church. It was something that I learned about while watching a single friend at Church go through her adoption. This came at a time when I had been giving myself daily shots, taking countless meds, going to the Fertility specialist everyday during my cycle...What she was doing seemed so much more logical. My attempts were not working. I hated fertility treatments. I hated focusing on me and my body that much. I hated my husband as well. I was trying to be forgiving of his indescretions during most of the treatments. Finding out that a woman could adopt alone freed my heart. It gave me a chance to admit that I couldn't forgive him at that time of my life.
Soooooo, my point in all of this is that although I firmly agree that families should reach out to ask for prayer, wise counsel, and donations for the ORPHANAGE, I don't agree that the majority of adoption funding should come from strangers!
So, if I sound like crazy Ann C, I am sorry. I love my adoption friends and would do anything for them. I just don't like the pressure of being put on the spot...
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