Guest Bloggers Are In The HizOuse!

Please forgive me..I am feeling silly today. There are just a few days before Christmas and I am all a flutter! Tonight we have a couple of guest bloggers. My daughters, MaryAnna and AugustRose. I am putting them on the spot, so...here we go!~ Anna: "I just had my winter concert for chorus. I got a speaking part. I got to introduce Ala Puerta, a Mexican folk song. I was super nervous. Everyone said I would do fine. At the end I was proud of myself, because I didn't fall off the stage. I was the loudest and the clearest speaker." AugustRose: "I am Julianne's daughter. She loves me. I sleep with her. I do my homework after school. It is easy. I like homework. I like school too. I love my Dadu, Anna, Oliver, Auntie, Aunt Lee, and my Poppy. We might get a new dog. Happy Christmas. and a Happy New Year! " Funny what they want to share. Anna got all silly and shy, August seemed sure to include everyone she loved.. The girlz have slept in my room since we said Adios to the dog..And I didn't realize how much I missed it. I am a firm believer in the family bed/room/co-sleeping. There are millions of parenting areas where I don't have a strong feeling about, but in this family, I believe in ending our day together. We are a small family of only females, which makes it very easy, but I think if I had boys who were still young, it would work as well..NOW, if there was a husband, I am not sure how that would work. I shared the other day that the girlz take turns sleeping with me. The one who is NOT sleeping with me, sleeps on the little couch that is in my room. It is at the foot of my bed so it's right here..The girlz have become afraid to sleep in their rooms this year. And I have to tell you, I don't believe in making them work through that right now. At some point, they will WANT to be in their rooms behind closed doors, so I am okay with easing their fear by keeping them close to me at night. I refuse to hear anyone debate me on this one. I am not changing my mind.. There are four days until we are finished with school. And Lord knows, I am ready. With sickness and general exhaustion, I am in need of a break. This year there is no Christmas Eve service at Church, so we are planning to go to DC mid-day to see the National Trees and to check out the Capitol Tree, which is always WAYY better. I am thinking we will have dinner in Union Station afterwards. I'd like to be home in the early evening. We only open ONE present that night. And it is a gift to the girlz. They know each year I get them a new set of jammies.. I will have to make a run to get PerriWinkle and keep her hidden from the girlz until morning. My mom may keep her until the morning..We haven't quite worked that out yet.. I sent a treat to AllieKat and she got it today. It was for her 16th birthday. I found a bunch of PUG items, (the girlz love to look for pug items since they have one) and I found her some silly little things. She is such a deserving little one. If I had my way, I'd bring AllieKat and her momma Lee up here for the new year. Ahh but there is that thing called cash. And neither one of us have extra piles of it laying around..Soon, though, Soon! Alright, the guest bloggers have fallen asleep, and it's made me awfully tired all of the sudden! Good Night!

Hard Line

I used to be a tender child. I used to have the soft and squishy feelings that many people still have. My life took many changes as a tween..I learned from my first love how to bob and weave my way through fights, altercations, and plain old jealousy...I learned at a tender age, that you either win or lose. And when you lose, you can't change anything with emotion. It just makes you hurt. And then as a teenager, my parents divorced. I hurt over that for such a long time. But once I was over it, I expected everyone to be over it..I had to pull my mom through the trenches to get her over it, and I honestly think she learned from me how to "Pull herself up by her bootstraps." And we have lived that way from that point on...I call it the bootstrap mentality. I haven't really experienced hurt like I did back in the tween and teen years ever again. Ever. Even my horrible marriage and divorce didn't hurt like those original hurts. Cause I pulled myself up, the bootstraps and all.. The kindergarten shooting has gotten me thinking. Thinking about the poor family that was at the center of the horror. It's clear from most reports that the boy was troubled. And as much as I don't want to say this, I have to wonder how much the family knew of his break with reality. I mean really, someone has to know when their child has so much "crazy" in them that they are willing to do such unthinkable things. I am willing to bet that we will find out that the boy was mentally ill, but not taking his medication. I wouldn't ever blame the family, but I have heard the mother was "rigid" and I have to wonder what that means? I know people like that. Rigid. They think that their own image is more important that actually getting their family help. It would unthinkable to the rigid sort to put their child in therapy, as it would reflect poorly on their ability to parent. They think they can "will" their child to behave and present themselves to the world in an acceptable way. But just like me, I am sure you can think of a family who is in the midst of dealing with a "troubled" child or two. And just like me, you wonder and almost know that there is a lifetime of problems ahead. As a teacher I can see them every day. I can see the families who will do everything in their power to pretent that their life is just honky dorry..But we all know. And I am sure that many people knew about the family in Connecticut. They knew and probably spoke about how the boy was "off".. Yet, distance and rigidity didn't seem to help the matter. Again, I won't blame the family. But if they couldn't focus in on their own child, then who could? I mean, should the child's teacher's be at fault for not identifying the problems and solving them? Should it be the Church? NO. The family. It all starts at the family. As you know I have been sick. I stayed home from school for 2 days and felt terribly guilty about it. On Wednesday when I came back, I found out the 12 students were absent, and then each day I had an average of 7 children absent. BUT, each day I had to send at least 2 children home. They were sick little puppies, but their parents sent them anyway. And what does that mean? I have to take instructional time to get them to the clinic and arrange to get them home. When all along the parents knew their babies were sick. Yes, the parents need to go to work, yes, they are very poor, but sending your sick child to school because YOU need to work, only makes all the other children sick. And it makes me sick too! These are the issues that I see everyday. Parents NOT being accountable. This year, I adore my students. A D O R E... They are loving and kind and smart and silly and so many of them are physically affectionate. One little girl actually tickles my shoes when I am doing the read a loud. She was one of the little ones who was sick and I had to send home. As she was waiting to be picked up, I looked at her and she was Hugging my purse. Hugging it like it was a baby. I asked her what she was doing and she quickly threw it down. I saw that she was embarrassed or ashamed and I told her, "Oh honey, it's ok. Do you want Ms. Green to give a squeeze?" She jumped up and came to me and jumped on my lap. Her hot little head was burning with a fever and I just squeezed her. This loud wiggly little girl wasn't so sparkly as she was very sick, so I just held her. When it was time for her to go, I told her it was ok to stay home. I hugged her and she gave me a sweet little kiss on my face. As strong as I am, this made me want to cry. Cry that she felt close enough to me to show that kind of affection, and also that she might not get those cuddles at home because her mom is irritated that she is missing work to take care of her.. I have been teaching for 22 years. I have seen so much in those years. One thing I know for sure, is that stress over work, and money, and bills create situations for children that are worrisome. After years of that kind of worry, it changes children. Maybe the Connecticut shooter saw those kind of problems in his home. Not money problems, but everyday problems. When children see their parents vulnerable is robs them of their sense of security and causes a shift. It changes a child. And not in a good way. We don't know yet, but in the coming months we will find out all the dirty little secrets of this person. But I already know that the family knew... One parent was at school eating with her child, and she went to get a water for herself. When asked to pay for the water, the mother said, "Oh my child is on free lunch." She was told, yes but bottled water is not a part of the lunch. The milk is the drink for the children. THe mother said, "Oh my child doesn't like milk." Then the cafeteria lady said, well we do not give water when the child has milk. The mother walked out. She walked back in and handed the milk back to the cafeteria lady. The lady said again, "We don't give bottled water to children. They must pay for it." The mother then said, "Can I get a cup of ice?" She was told that is only for adults who are paying for their lunch. The mother was trying her best to get something she was told she couldn't have. She kept pressing. I watched them leave and get into a mini van that was easily less than a couple of years old..How can they get free lunch when they can afford a new van? Again, it's what I see every day. Parents abusing the system.. I have learned after 22 years that when parents are willing to lie and abuse the system in one area, they are lying and abusing the system in a million ways..There is certain kind of person who uses their children as a "front" for getting benefits they don't deserve. They are usually without a concience and usually oblivious to the fact that what they are taking, is actually taking from those who really need it.. My hard line is not from being mean or arrogant. It's from years of seeing the problems of families, and from years of seeing the refusal of those families to do the right thing.. But hey, what do I know?

Sad

I had no idea about the shootings until I left work. We are all kind of in a bubble in our little kindergarten wing.We are at the corner of our building, and no one would pass through our hall without a purpose. We aren't watching the news or starring at our computers, so we just don't hear about national events until we leave for the day.. And as I write that, I sort of shutter... My girlz are spending the night with my sister, and I feel anxious to not have them here. Tonight is the kind of night you don't want to have your babies at someone else's home..It was such a difficult week for this momma anyway. I won't skip my flu shot next year, that is for sure.. And to end it with this sadness is just plain awful.. I want to share some happy happy joy joy but I almost feel guilty. So instead, I'll show you a little picture of our silly picture in NYC... Top of the Rock...

PerriWinkle Belle

************************** Sooo, this is the one..I THINK!! I have looked and looked for a puppy that is not "farm raised" or "Milled" that is raised in a home with a family. It is a bichon-schnauzer hybrid. And it is 6 weeks old today. If I can pull this off, it will be the suprise of the year. I took the girlz to see it, and then told them it was just too much money, and that I had to think about it..They have been asking about it every since. August held her and it licked her fingers, (there was probably left overs all over them) and it sort of High Fived Anna... The family who is belongs to lives in my city, so if I need anything, they will be able to help me. I have decided to use the vet that it has already seen..It looks big in the pictures, but it is only a little over 2 pounds there! It should be a pretty sturdy dog at about 10-12 pounds when she is an adult. On the way home, the girlz and I were talking about what we could name a puppy. We have been looking at pups and talking about them, and originally we thought of naming a pup "Macy" if we were to get it around Thanksgiving. But the other night the girlz came up with so many cute names.. I threw out naming it BLOOMIE-BELLE..As those are my two grandmother's names. Yes, one was Bloomie and one was Belle...but somehow the girls fell into "PerriWinkle" ......and I love it! They said when they are calling her, they can say, "Perrrrrriiiiiii". I think it is cute. And she looks like a little Perriwinkle. I have been doing research on dog behavior, and some say that it is best for bonding to take a dog between the 49-60th day. That is long enough to establish appropriate dog behavior, yet early so that a strong canine to himan bond..Fingers crossed!

Sick

What I thought was just "a little sick" has turned into, "OH mother of pearl, I have been run over by a MAC truck"... As I get older, I simply cannot handle getting sick. My joints ache like I am actually injured and my eyeballs feel like they are going to pop out of my head..Weird. I layed in bed all day Saturday, rolling around in my pitiful-ness thinking that somehow I would get better with rest..But it wasn't happening. Sunday I woke up irritated at the fact that my classroom was 80 degrees for 2 days..I'm good like that, I can always find a way to shift the blame..Cause I didn't get my flu shot, it can't be MY fault..SO I dragged myself to urgent care and the dear sweet doctor sent me out of there with Tamiflu, codeine-tylenol, eyedrops, and nausea medicine..I took them all on the ride home from CVS..I ran out of my diet coke and just swalled them dry! That's how bad I felt! I slept on and off all day and then decided I would take Anna to ballet since it was parents night. And now I am worn out. I am taking tomorrow off and will be back to the grind on Wednesday. YEahhhh. My Christmas cards came in the mail today. I love them. The pics are adorable of my girlz! And if you are lucky, you'll get one. Here's a little treat, send me your address and I will pop one in the mail to you... It's time for my meds..Night All!

Stuff

Man, I miss New York, and vacation life... I am getting a little bit sick, and hope that it doesn't turn into something big..I can't do teaching and sickness. Just too old for that. We are pretty much finished with the Christmas shopping so this weekend I can rest. I still have to purchase something for the girlz from my dad, but that will be easy. Helllllooo American girl. The girlz are going to my sister's house so I can really lay up all day. Even though my house is a hot mess! The girlz have no idea that I am getting them a puppy to replace the DAMN dog that went to live with a wonderful lady in Lurray. I am still searching for just the right mix but have a pretty good idea of the breeder I'd like to use.. THis year, all the gifts are purposeful. I didn't get any of the BS stuff that will be thrown away when it breaks. Just the things they want.. Sadly, I am already on a countdown to the end of the year. My students are truly presh, but the other stuff is what is killing me. You cannot imagine the "stuff I do because someone else created a document/test" and in order for that person to keep their job, I must do the useless thing...Really, taxpayers you wouldn't believe the nonsense and waste in my county. It's sad. And next year, I am really considering retiring. No, there won't be any money, but I have always wanted to do something different, and I am thinking about going back to school and taking odd jobs here and there to make ends meet...Oh hell, who am I kidding, I would have to have 10 odd jobs, but it almost feels better than the dread I have when driving into work.. Enough yucky stuff...My dad is probably going back to work full time. He can't seem to retire..What is wrong with him? I cannnnnooottt wait to retire..

Cards and Letters

I got my first Christmas card yesterday. THANK YOU TINA!! I love the idea of cards to celebrate the season. It's sort of a lost art. Most people are so connected through Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest that they think a simple, "Happy Holiday" does the trick. Well not me. Growing up in the south, I learned fast that Christmas cards, thank you notes, a "covered dish" for new mothers and loved ones who lose someone dear were the minimum. I am one of the few people who actually love to get the letters inside the cards. I may see you on facebook, but there are so many little bits of info that are shared in those letters that a post on a timeline doesn't cover.. So again, Thank You Tina for being ahead of the game and making our day! On a totally different note. THe beach house closed today. We are now in search for a new place to summer. My dad is going back to Lebanon, this time for longer. Not sure we want to spend our summers there, but hey ya never know until you try it!!